Thank you Kevin & Gary soo helpful!!!

My heart goes out to you. I have struggled with many of the same challenges you face. For many years I was looking for the easy way to make money and always judged the opportunity by what I could get out of it (money, time freedom, support system, etc…) instead of what I was willing to put into it. I bounced from place to place always thinking the secret to success was finding the right system. Then all I had to do was work the system and I would be successful… and rich… and respected… and loved by my family.

I quit going to church for over a year, which was hard because I was a deacon and youth leader at the time. I felt like I could not talk to anyone, nor did I want to be around anyone. For years I would go to bed angry and wake up miserable. I would fall asleep yelling at God because I thought He was forsaking me. My kids had learned to just leave me alone and my wife felt alone in our marriage.

Did God leave me? No. I think He was patiently waiting for me to stop trying to use Him as a way to get what I wanted through my prayers and pleading and yelling. As a father, I would hate it when my kids would throw a temper tantrum when they did not get what they wanted, yet one day it dawned on me that I was throwing temper tantrums at God because He was not giving what I wanted in life. What kind of Father was He to deny me the life I wanted? Could it be that because He had a much better life in store for me than what I wanted at the time? Isn’t that why we have to look at the bigger picture that our kids can’t see and somethimes tell them no.

I also realized that what God wants first and foremost is for us to have a relationship with Him, instead of just using Him as a prayer ATM. First and foremost I want a relationship with my kids. I want my kids to love me, trust me, and let me help them become successful in life… what I don’t want is to have them only come talk to me when they want something. I want to give them the world and will move heaven and earth to make it happen, however, I need to know that I can trust them with it. I want to know that if I do give them the world, that they still want to have a relationship with me… that they won’t just say thank you and leave.

In my opinion, that is what God is looking for from us. That is what I had to learn… and it appeared God was orchestrating things to teach me this. God had enrolled me in the “I want a relationship with you first” class and when I failed the test, He just kept re-enrolling me. It wasn’t that God was turning His back on me… it was that He loved me soooooo much that He was staring right at me with His hands reaching out to me and the only way He could get my attention was to allow circumstances of life to force me to look to Him.

One of the greatest changes in my life was when I learned how to take time out of my life each day and listen… and really listen to what God wanted to tell me. There was a very specific and pre-planned way that I learned where I would try to listen to God. It felt funny at first, but once I did it for a few days, my life started to change.

God started to become real to me, and even though the outward circumstances did not change right away, I had finally learned that God wanted to talk to me… directly!… and I was hurting so much that I needed to listen. When I started to seek a relationship with God and put meaning behind it by taking time to listen to Him, He was finally able to share things with me that I needed to hear… and wanted to hear. When I became more interested in a relationship with God and looking forward to hearing from Him… on whatever He wanted to tell me, it was then that I started to get some clarity on my life and decisions.

I want to encourage you and share with you that all hope is not lost. Your joy and hope for the future can be restored! Don’t stop fighting, the world needs you to keep fighting because there are people that you can reach with your story.

If you are interested in the resource that I used to learn how to pray and listen to God then please email me and I will share it with you.

My heart goes out to you. Don’t stop fighting! Your joy can be restored!

Jerry

Email me at jerrycampbell01577@yahoo.com if you wish.

At age 46 (now going on 48) and after 3 failed business attempts (one Kevin Miller coached me on – Bucket List Adventure Coaching), I’ve been working hard to become a Firefighter.  After earning certifications as GA Firefighter 1, Nat’l & GA EMT-I, CPR/AED/FA Instructor, Hazmat Aw & Ops, FEMA NIMS 100/200/700, GEMA Crash Victim Extrication, GEMA Rescue Specialist, AHA Healthcare Provider, GA Vol FF, First Responder, and now enrolled in Paramedic class (you don’t have to know what they mean but you can tell I’ve tried), I’m still not employed with a fire department, even after applying everywhere within an hour drive, although came close and am still in the process with others.  I have even expanded my career search into the EMS field since it’s so closely related to firefighting and typically combined stations.

Here’s what I’m struggling with….not only am I having to work so hard trying to “be good enough” by training and competing against guys half my age, the more I learn about the profession the more challenges I discover.  Besides the low pay and answering to incompetent leaders, it’s hard to see a career path/ladder to follow especially starting off so late in the game.  My goal was to become an instructor/coach in the Rescue field and I have achieved a few steps of that by teaching CPR/AED/First Aid at our state tech school, but I’m still not seeing the gold at the end of the rainbow.  And I don’t just mean $.  I like the honor, prestige, adrenalin, pride, and so on, that comes with the profession but do miss being the one ultimately in charge with no limitations or set schedule, plus I’m afraid I will get frustrated with the pace of promotion.

Basically, I’m settling for what first appeared to be the easy way out of taking risks being my own boss.  But after losing both $ & faith in past business flops, I’m scared to venture out and don’t expect support from family.  Where will I find the answers?!  Sorry, but I even gave up on dialing into God through prayer for the answers.  I could lie like a lot of others in church but the truth is I’ve lost faith in myself, God & business in this economy.  Where to now as I’m studying for another tough Unit Exam for Paramedic class that I don’t think I’ll pass.

Sincerely your troubled Firefighter-wannabe,

Kevin Crowe

He has a huge heart for helping people that need help making career decisions and was very impressed with how much he helped me in such a short amount of time. As I continue on my journey I will always remember him as someone who played a great role in my life and want to share him with the world any time I get a chance.

Last week during the FAA all member chat, we talked about a decision that I was facing… whether to find a steady, safe and predictable job or put my whole heart into the business idea I am pursuing. You gave me wise counsel and said to seek out and talk with a couple of guys who could help me with this decision.

One of them was career coach Rob Clinton. He graciously gave me his time as we talked through this decision. As we talked he asked me a couple of great questions. One was, what is more important to you, finding a job or pursing your business? Seems like a simple question, but it started me to really think of what is ultimately more important. The answer was the business because it would allow me to be who I feel I was created for and, if successful, would give me more of what I want than a traditional job.

He asked the next question that was pivotal. How much longer can you remain in your current situation before you absolutely have to make a change in your financial position? The answer is that while I want my situation to improve, my current job is flexible, covers the bills (barely), but is relativley stress free.

As I related this to my wife later that night, she asked me a great question…If you get a job, where would God be? In other words, if I went out to get a job and pursued that for income and because of the 50 hour work week and stress, have to put my idea on the back burner for awhile, how much would I grow closer to God and allow Him to work?

I understand that if I chose to the job, I could still pursue God and I would still need Him to be successful in the job, but it seems that God is guiding me to leave the status quo of a just finding secure job that doesn’t thrill my sould and take a risk to build a business with the need to rely Him more.

Scary….. but as we learned in in church this past week, Peter got out of the boat and walked on water as long as he kept his eys on Jesus. As soon as Peter stopped looking at Jesus and looked at his circumstances, he started to sink.

Many people read that story, believe it, but never get to apply that in their own lives… having to keep your eyes on Jesus as you try to do something that seems incredible.

As I stand before the tunnel that Gary talks about, looking into it and seeing how excited I am about the opportunity to pursue something that excites me and at the same time seeing how scary it could become, my emotions are running wild like a roller coaster.

My hope is that I can keep my eyes squarely fixed on Jesus as I get out of the boat and try not to sink.

Jerry Campbell

K, bye

K, bye

K, bye 

K, bye

I think I may not have communicated what I was trying to say clearly enough, or you may have misunderstood the context of the quote you extracted from my comment. I disagree that people should “seek righteousness by ‘denying’ themselves and living their faith like a burden where they are really of little use to anyone”, and that is not the point I was making.

As I’m sure you know, in the movie “Chariots of Fire”, Eric Liddell says, “I believe God made me for a purpose, but He also made me fast. And when I run I feel His pleasure.” Eric’s purpose was not running, it was pleasing God–but he did that by running, and doing so to the very best of his ability. if I were to want to perform a piano concerto at Carnegie Hall, the I must practice every day. My goal is not practicing, but it is a key, and perhaps the most important vehicle for doing so.

In the same way, my purpose is “to serve, honor, and glorify God.” One of the best vehicles for doing so is to know my purpose and live it out. But that is not the goal. If *my* goal is to find *my* purpose and live *my* life the way that makes *me* happy and allows *me* to work out of *my* strengths, that’s starting to sound just a touch like the “rich fool” in Luke 12. But if my goal is to love and serve God by living the way He designed me, fulfilling His purpose and calling on my life, in order to serve others and bring glory to Him, and an important part of the way I do that is to discover what makes up that purpose and calling, then that is very different. In many ways it may express itself similarly, but the heart is quite different.

As a friend of mine said as we were having this discussion over the weekend: “I don’t think that we need to run away from what
we like or are good at in an effort to make sure that God is being glorified
because without Him we would suck at something. It seems that the input that
God does have and exert on our makeup (to whatever degree) would be best
utilized if it lined up with what we do for kingdom purposes. God seems
efficient like that. But at the same time, there will be times and tasks that
require us to use a skill, temperament or whatever outside of our norm in order
to be kingdom minded.” That is what I was getting at in part of my comment. And you know, I think sometimes God may do that just to stretch us a bit, give us an opportunity to trust Him more than we ordinarily need to, or even discover something more about our calling that we may not have known before because we’d never had occasion to do/experience ____________.

Does that make more sense/align better with what you were saying?

If God made me a duck, my responsibility is to seek Him and be aware that I’m a duck. Otherwise I end up spending my life at half speed doing things I’m not so great at. If it’s taking my my whole life to discover this, I’m probably not listening to him very well. Or my focus is on the quest and not Him. If my whole focus is on just being a duck and doing only as I desire and is easy as a duck and not seeking how I can be fully and best used, again…folly is on me.

As a duck, serving God, He will assign me to tasks and missions beyond what I feel capable with. Pulling big loads that make it hard to swim. Turbulent waters, strong currents, shark infested waters. I can’t do it without Him. 

But folks so often try to make a case that trying to discover you’re a duck is narcissistic. And if you’re a duck and actually enjoy and excel at swimming, you’re just being self serving. So what’s righteous is being ignorant of how God uniquely made you. And even more righteous is knowing you excel at swimming, and therefor committing to run as ‘picking up your cross’. 

Bottom line, I don’t see the fruit. And I let that be my guide…who is best inspiring and influencing and serving?

There is value in knowing our strengths and seeking to use them to serve and glorify God, but always, consciously and intentionally, be aware and receptive to…
            ~ Sometimes God will require of us, for a specific reason or for a season, to serve Him outside of our strengths (being uncomfortable and serving out of our weaknesses)
            ~ Sometimes we will experience times of weakness and brokenness. At these times we must seek Him more, and find our comfort and contentment in Him.
 
 
Our sufficiency is always found in Christ alone. Sometimes He provides that with a knowledge of exactly what we are here to do “at such a time as this”, through good jobs that we love, goals that we’re achieving, and balance in our lives. Sometimes He provides it through His presence, the people He puts in our lives, and miraculous provision for sources we could never expect, when everything else has been taken away. But it all comes from Him, and when we start glorying in our strength (any part of it) as being from ourselves, which we can take credit for entirely apart from His gifts, we are getting on shaky ground. this is exactly what you were saying in the example you gave.
 
It all comes down to heart and motivation. Are we seeking to know ourselves for our own sake or for His? To find a way to be comfortable and happy or to serve Him as He has equipped us, on the mountaintops or in the valleys?
 
Ultimately our goal must not be to find our purpose, but to serve, honor, and glorify God. At times—perhaps many times—that will mean serving out of the gifts & talents He’s given us, sharing out of our abundance, and knowing how He’s wired us allows us to do that more fully and be the best stewards we can be of what He has entrusted to us. But there will also come times when the opposite is true. Can we say, “I see how you have made me, and that is not it. I know how You have designed me, and what You are asking of me is far outside that. But because You say it, I will follow You and do it, no matter the cost.”?

To me, the most challenging part is still differentiating my wants from what God wants for me. But I believe that when the Bible says, “Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart” (Prov. 37:4), it’s not saying that He will give us whatever we want. It’s saying that as we delight ourselves in Him, He will shape our desires so that they ARE His desires, and so the more we do that, the more closely our heart aligns with His and the more what we find as the desires of our hearts are His desires for us.

For now, I feel compelled to share this movie clip with you. For any of you who have not seen Astronaut Farmer, you NEED to own this movie. I’ll go so far to say that I believe it should be added to FAA’s “must watch” list. Here’s the official trailer. 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=390WaPcxnFI 

The line “you better know what you wanna do, before somebody knows it for you” is very powerful and, to me, crystallizes FAA’s message of FAAith! Again, I thank you, Teri, your family and all the professors for availing yourselves to us with such love, encouragement, acceptance and passion. Major blessings to you all! 

To answer your question… just as I did in FAA, the figuring it out will come through relationships, mentoring, working out my gifts and actually applying them instead of spending all my time on my weaknesses.  I just have to be patient.  I was just listening to a seminar recording sharing several inspiring stories of how godly men who through challenging experiences, faith in God and His word, and building solid relationships, maid giant impacts in the world.

Unfortunately, I like many others were raised to be “self-made” instead of building relationships with God and the people around us… and I have to fight against that nature every day.